The only recollection from my childhood of anything spiritual was something that used to happen to me, up until the age of around six.
Often I could only remember the start of the experience before sleep drew the curtains on my conscious awareness, at other times remember more of it, or the end of it. Often though, I would remember the whole event. I just assumed it was something that happened to everyone, so never really spoke about it. Later on I forgot about ever having those experiences, and it was only when I started meditating in my mid-twenties that they came back to me.
As I was falling asleep I would feel myself going upwards, sometimes very fast, at first everything around me was very crowded and busy and often dark, but then the higher I went the quieter and more spacious everything became; it was like being high above the clouds, so quiet and peaceful. There was never anyone else there, no places, or people or shapes, just the enormous sky and an immense peace, and then there would be a soft light, at first light a mist, but then the light got brighter and more translucent until I couldn’t see anything but light, like an immense sea of light, and it started flowing through me as if I were a sponge, and then I couldn’t feel any difference between myself and the light, I belonged to it and it belonged to me, and I would start to spread out and I would become huge, like I was just melting into the light, it was the most exquisite feeling of pure joy. Sometimes it seemed like a long time passed, other times it only seemed to last for a few moments. Then I would have this strange sensation of it all beginning to fade, and someone from far below calling me back, and then I would feel myself going down and getting closer to the earth, at times I could even see my little body curled up on the bed just before I slipped back inside it and woke up and there was our world, and home and family and breakfast; somehow I always felt that I had two homes, one ‘up there’ and the other on earth.
It all seemed to stop not long after I started school, and I never had those experiences again,, I missed them so much, my sleep was never as sweet, and things that before I could deal with began to trouble me. Curiously enough when I started meditating I started being able to recall them.
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